The first time my husband Luke and I became intimate, he didn’t know I had lymphedema. Since the swelling in my legs is mild, it’s not something he would have easily noticed (especially since he was quite distracted!).
Funny, it wasn’t the lymphedema as much as the compression stockings that I wasn’t ready to share with him. Laying naked in bed baring your body’s imperfections, even if it is a foot or arm that is fatter than the other, is beautiful – that’s what intimacy is all about. But for someone with lymphedema, getting to that state can feel less than sexy. There was no Dance of the Seven Veils for Luke.
In the movies, when they get hot and heavy, they don’t do a closeup to reveal the ingenue’s compression garments and watch while she takes a time-out to strenuously remove them. And that’s not a scene I wanted to play out either. At some point when we were getting close, I excused myself to the bathroom, yanked off my stockings, put my clothes back on and rejoined Luke.